Monday, August 13, 2012

Drunken Mitsake

                                                         
Rajkumar is going to get married in 2 days. His friends arranged a party for him today on his own money. Tequila, scotch, Vodka and Beers were arranged on the center of the room.
Sundar was arranging the seats, laying newspapers in the floor, opening side dishes and sharing equally on all plates and once he is done, he yelled “Hey! All you lazy ******, come soon and sit. Let’s get it started”. Santhosh said, “Hey everyone come soon, before Sundar loses his temper and break someone’s head with a bottle”.
Everyone came and seated soon fearing for Sundar. Because everyone knows how Sundar would get mad if it gets late for drinking. Everyone started with a tequila shot and went ahead with either Scotch or Vodka as per their choices. After few rounds got over and everyone became little high, they started the chitchat.
Magesh said “Raj, you start to tell your story”.
Raj asked “What story”.
Magesh sarcastically said, “The Crow, the fox and the old lady story. Stupid, The story of your marriage, what else? You were saying that you don’t want to get married for another 2 years and now your marriage is fixed within 3 months. How did that happened?”
“Oh!! That story……” said Raj, by starring angrily at Sundar.
Santhosh started laughing and said “it’s all due to the courtesy of the Sundar and Mr. McDowell”.
Everyone started asking “why? What happened?”, “What Sundar did?”.
Santhosh said “OK. Everyone calm down, I’ll explain what happened”.
Magesh said “Wait, let Raj himself explain, and seems he is very angry, so we will get to hear in the exact tone”.
Raj said “No no, I won’t tell. I might get angry again. Let Santhosh explain”.
Santhosh started explaining:
“Some 3 months back, Raj came to Chennai from Bangalore for a weekend. Before coming itself he told, ‘I want to get drunk heavily this time, so arrange everything before I come there. There shouldn’t be any waste of time. We should say ‘cheers’, the moment I entered the door’.  So as he said, we bought a full and a half and chicken, eggs for side dish and cool drinks for mixing etc, and started drinking immediately after he came in. Then we started chatting as usual, about how jobs are boring and how all our managers are ****. Then the topic shifted to ‘girlfriends’, as none of us have a girlfriend, technically it’s about ‘not-having-a-girlfriend’ and then it shifted to ‘Marriage’ and from where the problem started.

Sundar asked Raj, ‘when are you decided to get married?’ to which Raj replied, ‘not in near future, at least it’ll take two years’.
Sundar said ‘Two years? Why would you wait 2 years, you don’t have a brother or sister. You’re the only boy in home.  You should get married soon’.
Raj replied, ‘should I marry soon if I’m the only child to my parents? 27 is the correct age for boys, so no marriage for next two years’.

Sundar said, ‘Dude, get married when you’re 25 and become a father when you’re 27, so it won’t be too much age gap between you and your children. If you feel awkward to tell your father, let me know, I’ll call him and inform. See us, I have an elder sister and Santhosh has an elder brother. We have to wait till they get married. We’ll be 28 or 29, when we get married and we’ll be an Uncle when we become a Dad.’
Raj said, ‘Looks like you’re the man with the plan, but unable to stick to it and grieving inside. If you want, I can call your Dad and inform that his son wants to get married before his sister’.
Sundar said, ‘Don’t you dare. My sister will kill me if she heard like that’.

Then they kept talking like this for few minutes and out of nowhere they started fighting. Sundar dialed Raj’s Dad’s number and threatened Raj that he is going to press the call button and Raj threatened back that he is going to call Sundar’s sister and one leads to another and suddenly they started fighting physically and were rolling together in the ground. Sundar ripped Raj’s shirt and Raj tore Sundar’s lungi and Raj’s cell phone got broken. I didn’t try to separate them at first as it was fun to watch them fight, but later when I tried, they didn’t stop as it became more fun to them. So I left them and went to bed. But they keep talking trash to each other like Sundar said ‘If I didn’t tell your father, I won’t wear lungi ever again in my life’, to which Raj replied ‘If that happens, I don’t know what else I’ll tore other than lungi’. Then I don’t know when they went to bed and I don’t remember afterwards”.

Once Santhosh completed, everyone started asking, “Then what happened Raj?”, “Did Sundar told Raj’s Dad?”, etc.
Raj said, “Yes that asshole blabbered to my parents that I Wish to marry soon”.
Everyone starred at Sundar sarcastically.
Sundar said, “Hey I didn’t do it in full sense. In fact, I don’t remember calling them at all”.
Raj, said angrily “See, he is still not accepting his mistake”.
Sundar said, “Hey I didn’t say I didn’t call, I just don’t remember anything. I may have called definitely, during fight I dialed your Dad’s number, so I must’ve pressed dial after some time mistakenly and blabbered everything”.
Santhosh asked Sundar, “You didn’t even remember you saying that you won’t wear lungi ever again in your life if you don’t tell his father?”
Sundar said, “Hmmm….No, I don’t remember that too”.
Magesh asked Raj, “Wait, when he says he doesn’t remember anything, how did you come to know that he called? Did your Dad tell you?”
Raj said, “No, he didn’t say anything directly to me. But the next weekend I went to my home and my Mom and Dad both talked in a strange way the whole time. One day I just asked ‘Mom, it’s already 2 ‘o’ clock, Lunch is not ready yet?’. She replied ‘who knows when you want anything earlier or late; we can’t read your mind’. I didn’t understand what that mean. And my Dad kept asking if any of my friends got married and if at what age they got married, etc etc.  And you know how my Dad is, he only decides whatever I need and even if I say I didn’t like one thing which he selected for me, he used to feel like there’s a big gap between us and become sentimental. That day we were some watching some talk show in TV and he said ‘Nowadays, Parents don’t know much about their children as much as their friends do isn’t it?’ If any of your Dad said that, that isn’t a big deal. But if my Dad says, definitely something happened. And finally they said that they have seen a girl for me. Then only I got doubt and wondered if Sundar said anything to them that night. So I didn’t ask him directly. I called Santhosh and asked him to check the dialing list in Sundar’s mobile on the day we drank. And we found out that he called my Dad sometime after we slept. But this A**** keep saying he don’t remember”.
Magesh asked “So, you didn’t ask your Dad anything about that?”
Raj said, “What do you want me to ask? My Dad doesn’t even know I drink. How come I would ask if my friend called you when he is drunk and blabbered anything? I couldn’t even face them properly after that”.
Sundar said, “Why are you still worrying? Everything ended perfectly right?”
Others also said, “Our bachelor lives are sucking anyway. So getting married now isn’t that bad. So you don’t have to worry”.
Sundar said, “What’s there to worry, when you’re fiancé is a good figure?”.
Everyone looked at Sundar in anger and Raj became furious.
Sundar realized his mistake and tried to calm them by saying, “Hey, what I meant was that what’s wrong with our SISTER-in-law? (Pressing hard on the word SISTER) Isn’t she a good match for him? In fact Raj, our SISTER-in-law is too much for you”.
Magesh asked Raj, “Hey did you talked to her properly? Or just ‘Hi, hello, thanks’ like you talk to other girls?”.
Raj said, “Yeah we talked a lot. At first I was very shy and didn’t talk much. She used to tease me why I’m not talking much. Then I got used to it. Not used to getting teased, used to talk. But still I regret that I couldn’t do many things which I wanted to do like going on a date. I didn’t get time, everything happened so fast. And I wanted to do one more thing very much, but didn’t get a chance.”
Everyone got shocked at the last sentence and looked at him in awe and said “you mean????????”
 “No, no, not that, guys. I just ….wanted…one ….kiss…before…. marriage, that it” said Raj by swallowing half of the words and looking shy.
Sundar sarcastically said, “We meant kiss only, why? What did you think we meant?”, and winked his eyes looking at others.
Everyone smiled and Magesh said, “Well, you still have more than 24 hours, so……..”.
Raj said,”no, not now. I’m over it”.
After few more minutes of chatting, few members started to vomit and one by one everybody passed out in few minutes.
Raj woke up early in the morning and went to see the marriage arrangements. Others woke up at the next day afternoon and went to Wedding hall in the evening.  Next day morning is Raj’s marriage and tonight they had a lot of formalities. Raj was busy in all those and after dinner he had a little free time so he came to spend some time with his friends who were gathered together at one corner of the hall.
An 8 year old girl came to Raj and gave him a small piece of sheet. He opened and saw “Come to open terrace in top floor immediately” written in it. Before he asks the girl who gave it, the girl ran away. He got confused and went to terrace wondering who would have called him there at this time.
It was little cold in the terrace with a mild breeze blowing. No one seemed to be there, and then his fiancé came to the terrace.  Even after looking at her his stupid mind still wondered, “Why she called me here?” She came to him and said “I got only five minutes, and then they will start calling me”.
He thought, “Is it going to happen what I think it is?” She came near him and kissed him gently on his lips. He thought “Oh dear god, this dream should not end soon”. Once she is finished, he realized it’s not a dream.  He looked at her smiling and of course with full surprise. She said, “Ok that’s one thing you can cross off from your list.”
He asked, “List? What list?”
“What list?!?!..the one you told me about yesterday night”, she said.
“I told you? Yesterday? When?”, he asked in full surprise.
She said, “you drunkard!! You drunk so much that you don’t even remember calling me? Don’t know how many people you’ve called so far, when you get drunk. I’ll put an end to all this drinking after marriage. Ok, I have to go” and she left.
He was totally confused and checked his cell phone and yes he had called her yesterday after midnight.But he couldn't remember anything about calling her yesterday.
He kept thinking about the sentence she said, “Don’t know how many people you’ve called so far, when you get drunk.” And it made him to re-analyze this whole marriage story.

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